When my daughter was one, she and I had gone to the grocery store one day. It was a pretty hot day so after the car had cooled off, I put my little one in her car seat and left the car on, obviously so she could get the air conditioning while I piled recently bought food into my trunk. Like other normal people, I had the radio playing; Lynard Skynard happened to be on when a woman came over to her car, parked next to mine. She was older than me, probably in her 40s. She was dressed conservatively, wearing a long dress in the Texas heat. I could feel her staring at me, judging me, seeing my P.O.S. car and tattoos...but never in my wildest dreams did I think she would actually approach me.
"You shouldn't let your daughter listen to that." She was so nonchalant, as if it was normal to tell others how to parent. "Excuse me?" I looked at her, utterly dumbfounded, and closed
my trunk. She looked directly at me, without hesitation, and said, "Letting your daughter listen to that devil music will make her either a teenage parent or end up in jail."
I couldn't believe what I had just heard. Was this the 1950s, when rock and roll was banned from schools and homes? Before people appreciated nothing more than wordless music and hymns? Still shocked, I wasn't really mad and she was not going to get to me. I simply looked at her and said, "How I raise my daughter is none of your business whatsoever. But, to clear something up, my daughter's moral compass will not be ruled by music. It will be based on the morals and values that her father and I instill in her. And I feel terribly sorry for
your children since they were obviously raised to be closed-minded and intolerant of anything that they don't understand." Her jaw dropped and she fumbled with her keys as she quickly tried to get into her car and end the short interaction. I got in my car and turned the music up...not too much for the little one's ears, though.
As she is getting older and beginning to sing along with songs, I pay close attention to what I play around her. Yes, she likes singing along with "B-I-N-G-O" and she is constantly singing "Itsy Bitsy Spider," although she says "isy dider." Sometimes when we're in the car, especially on longer drives, I'll put in her CD with all of the kids' songs. And sometimes I'll turn it to a classic rock station or throw in my Elvis CD. Her current favorite song is "Let It Be" by The Beatles.
My husband and I both have extremely eclectic tastes in music. While I was pregnant, we decided that we wanted our kiddo to be exposed to different music too. If she doesn't like a type of music or changes her mind, that's fine. She's entitled to her own opinions, just like everyone else. For now, she's really into rock from the 60s, 70s, and 80s. She also likes electronica because she loves to dance, and the little bit of hip hop that she has heard. (It's hard to find hip hop that a two-year-old can listen to.) I find it a bit amusing that I grew up listening to country music and she pretty much can't stand it. Maybe that will change later on, and maybe it won't; I don't want her to be who we want her to be - I want her to be herself.
Judge me as you will for our parenting decisions. We will do what we feel is best and what works for our family. And she will be exposed to all kinds of music. Just like I told the crazy anti-Lynard Skynard lady, how we raise our daughter is no one else's business whatsoever.
If you don't want your kids listening to The Eagles, then don't let them listen to it. You do you, and I'll do me.
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